When I was a kid, I could control my dreams. I had a magic word — "Abracadabra" — not very imaginative, but hey, I was five. If a monster was chasing me or I started falling, I could just say the magic word and the dream would end.
I naturally thought everyone could do this, until I started talking to other kids. I can't say they ever made fun of me for it, but I got made fun of for a lot of other things (like my crazy hair and big ears), so the simple fact that other kids didn't know what I was talking about became a sort of peer pressure. Over time, the power to control my dreams went away.
When I was 15, I read an article in Omni magazine (I loved pop psychology, even before I got my Ph.D. in psychology) about lucid dreaming, the skill of realizing that you're dreaming during a dream. A few years later, I applied for and won a fellowship to study lucid dreaming at Stanford with Stephen LaBerge. I soon realized that there were plenty of people like me, and the power slowly came back.
This isn't about lucid dreaming. It's about the power you let people take from you.
I read recently that kids naturally love to draw — I know I did — but when those same kids become adults, they not only stop drawing — they think they can't draw. Physically, nothing has changed. In the intervening years, we've simply seen other people become "artists", and as their talents grew, we started judging ourselves. With judgment, our powers faded.
It makes me wonder what other powers I've lost and how I can get them back.
If I only had one message left for the rest of the world, and especially for my little girl, I would tell them to never let anyone take away your power. It's not enough to passively resist. It's not enough to say "no" in your head while saying "yes" with your hands. You have to exercise your power every day.
Say the things out loud you're not supposed to say. Run where you're supposed to walk — just don't run with scissors (you'll poke your eye out). Draw no matter how much you suck at it. Control your dreams even if everyone else is trapped in a sleeping fog. Take back your power.
